5ive Guys FC

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A A Gill

Andrew Swanston read law at Cambridge, but was inspired to write by his lifelong interest in early modern history. His Thomas Hill novels – The King’s Spy, The King’s Exile and The King’s Return – are set against the backdrops of the English Civil War, Cromwell’s Commonwealth and the early Restoration respectively. He is also the author of Waterloo: The Bravest Man and Beautiful Star and Other Stories. His first historical thriller set during the reign of Elizabeth I – Incendium (published in paperback as The Incendium Plot) – introduced readers to the academic, lawyer and intelligencer Dr Christopher Radcliff, whose adventures continue in Chaos. Andrew Swanston lives in Surrey.

A D Swanston

A E Langsford

A G Hopkins

A. J. BAIME is the New York Times best-selling author of The Arsenal of Democracy: FDR, Detroit, and an Epic Quest to Arm an America at War and Go Like Hell: Ford, Ferrari, and Their Battle for Speed and Glory at Le Mans. Both books are in development for major motion pictures. Baime is a longtime regular contributor to the Wall Street Journal, and his articles have also appeared in the New York Times, Popular Science, and Men’s Journal. He lives in Granite Bay, California. Visit him at facebook.com/ajbaime and trumanbook.com.

A J Baime

A J Jacobs

A J P Taylor

Anthony James Pollard is a British medieval historian, specialising in the fifteenth century and in particular the Wars of the Roses. A leading authority in the field, he is profesor emeritus of Teesside University. His books include North-Eastern England during the Wars of the Roses, Richard III and the Princes in theTower, Imagining Robin Hood: the Late Medieval Stories in Historical Context and Warwick the kingmaker: Politics, Power and Fame.

A J Pollard

A J Rochester

A K Benjamin is a clinical neuropsychologist and the author of Let Me Not Be Mad: A Story of Unravelling Minds.

A K Benjamin

A. L. Berridge read English at Oxford, and taught for ten years before moving into television, where her production credits range from period drama and thrillers to long-running soaps. She has written two previous novels, Top Ten besteller Honour and the Sword and In the Name of the King. Into the Valley of Death is her third novel.

A L Berridge

Alison Gaylin's first job was as a reporter for a celebrity tabloid, which sparked a lifelong interest in writing about people committing despicable acts. More than a decade later, she wrote and published her Edgar-nominated first novel, HIDE YOUR EYES. 
 
She's since published nine more books, including the USA Today and international bestselling Brenna Spector suspense series, which has been nominated for the Edgar, Anthony and Thriller awards and won the Shamus award. 
 
She lives in upstate New York with her husband, daughter, cat and dog.

A L Gaylin

A Maxwell-Hyslop

A McArthur

A P Wavell

A.S. Webb is the Sunday Times bestselling author of Daughter of Chaos, the first instalment of The Dark Pantheon Trilogy. She is inspired by stories rooted in history and mythology, that push the boundaries of imagination and urge us to reflect on what it means to be human.

A S Webb

A. A. Dhand is the author of six previous novels, and has been shortlisted for the CWA Steel Dagger Award. His DI Harry Virdee novels are currently being adapted for TV by the BBC. He was raised in Bradford and spent his youth observing the city from behind the counter of a small convenience store. After qualifying as a pharmacist, he worked in London and travelled extensively before returning to Bradford to start his own business and begin writing. The history, diversity and darkness of the city have inspired all his novels. For more information about A. A. Dhand and his books, follow him on X @aadhand, and on Instagram @aa_dhand.

A. A. Dhand

A. A. Gill

A. A. Milne

A. Anatoli

A. B. Poranek grew up sharing her time between Ontario, Canada and rural Poland, and eventually completed a veterinary degree at the Warsaw University of Life Sciences. A lover of mythology and history, she enjoys exploring both in her writing. Her debut novel, Where the Dark Stands Still, an instant New York Times bestseller, is an ode to Poland's folktales, while A Treachery of Swans transports readers to a world inspired by 17th century France.

A. B. Poranek

A. Bradley

Professor A. C. Grayling is Principal of the New College of the Humanities at Northeastern University, London, and a Supernumerary Fellow of St Anne's College, Oxford. He has written and edited over thirty books on philosophy, history, science and current affairs. For several years he wrote columns for the Guardian newspaper and The Times and was the chairman of the 2014 Man Booker Prize.

A. C. Grayling

A.D. Miller is the author of Snowdrops, The Earl of Petticoat Lane and The Faithful Couple. Snowdrops was a bestseller and was shortlisted for many prizes including the Man Booker and the CWA Gold Dagger. It was translated into 25 languages. As Moscow Correspondent of The Economist A.D. Miller has travelled across the former Soviet Union and covered the Orange Revolution in Ukraine; he is now the magazine’s Culture Editor based in London. 
 
admillerbooks.com

A. D. Miller

A. E. Ellis

A. E. W. Mason

A. Humphreys

A. Igoni Barrett was born in Port Harcourt, Nigeria, in 1979 and lives in Lagos. He is a winner of the 2005 BBC World Service short story competition, the recipient of a Chinua Achebe Center Fellowship, a Norman Mailer Center Fellowship, and a Rockefeller Foundation Bellagio Center Residency. His short story collection, Love is Power, or Something Like That, was published in 2013. In 2014 he was named on the Africa39 list of sub-Saharan African writers under 40. Blackass is his first novel.

A. Igoni Barrett

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David Jason

THE #1 SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER: a hilarious and heartfelt new autobiography from the national treasure Sir David Jason 
 
'There are British telly icons and then there is Sir David Jason. This book is such gold . . . an absolute delight' ZOE BALL 
___________________________ 
 
'During my life and career I have been given all sorts of advice and learned huge amounts from some great and enormously talented people. I've been blessed to play characters such as Derek Trotter, Granville, Pop Larkin and Frost, who have changed my life in all sorts of ways, and taught me lessons that go far beyond the television set. And I've worked a few things out for myself as well, about friendship, ambition, rejection, success, failure, adversity and fortune. 
 
With any luck, some of these thoughts and observations will chime with episodes and challenges you have faced, or are facing, in your own life. And if they don't. . . well, hopefully, at the very least you'll get to have a good old laugh at my expense. 
 
So lean back, pour yourself a glass, and try not to fall through the bar flap . . .' 
___________________________ 
 
'An absolute delight . . . a romp with so much detail. Offers wisdom in difficult times . . . like being invited into his living room' BBC BREAKFAST 
 
'It's beautifully written . . . so conversational and chatty . . . it's so lovely and warm' CHRIS MOYLES

A Del of a Life

The hilarious #1 bestseller from the national treasure

Nick Pettigrew

'Anti-Social is brutally honest, exceptionally funny and terribly sad - a scything indictment of broken 21st century Britain. I could not put it down.' THE SECRET BARRISTER 
 
'A fascinating insight into a job that stitches together the cracks in compassion in our communities' RENI EDDO-LODGE, bestselling author of Why I Am No Longer Talking To White People About Race 
 
'Superb. This hysterically funny and moving memoir of an anti-social behaviour officer is a real eye-opener that hits all the right notes' FRANKIE BOYLE 
__________________ 
 
Anti-Social is the diary of a disillusioned local authority worker whose job it is to keep people happy, or at least away from each other's throats. That's hard enough at the best of times, but when your day features secret hoarders, violent disputes over dance music and litigious arms dealers, the total breakdown of local society is never far away. The only thing keeping it together are the chronically underfunded officers charged with patching the fraying threads of civilisation, and they have a hard enough time keeping themselves together. 
 
 This is an urgent, timely but, most of all, hysterically funny memoir of a life spent working with the people society wants to forget and the problems that nobody else can resolve. This book will make you laugh, cry and boil with rage, all within a single sentence. 
 
 Updated with a new chapter for the paperback edition 
__________________ 
 
'Get this book ... I'm telling you now, you will absolutely love this guy, what he has to say and the book that he has written. In equal parts devastating and dark and incredibly funny.' NIHAL ARTHANAYAKE 
 
'Laugh-out-loud funny. The delivery is punchy and the humour dark - think Irvine Welsh minus the Scottish vernacular' EXPRESS 
 
'Think Adam Kay's This is Going to Hurt but with more dead bodies ... It's a gloriously cynical read but it's also sympathetic and deeply empathetic.' KATHY BURKE 
 
'Riveting and brilliantly written... a potent cocktail of heartbreak and horror; wickedly funny, wearily endearing and absolutely enraging' CAROLINE SANDERSON, Bookseller 
 
'A funny, thoughtful look into one of the toughest jobs I can imagine' SHAPPI KORSANDI 
 
'I absolutely loved it. It reads like a novel, has that page-turning quality everyone looks for in a good book but it delivers the punch that only true life can - funny obviously but with humanity and warmth for people at the edges of society most in need of our understanding and compassion' KIT DE WAAL, author of My Name Is Leon 
 
'Brilliant. This deserves to be a huge success - funny, sad and heartbreaking' LORRAINE KELLY 
 
__________________ 
Reader reviews for Anti-Social: 
 
'The timing of this book could not be better' 
'Politicians of all hues should be made to read this book' 
'Readable and compulsive' 
'Well written and stunningly well observed' 
'The author and all his long-suffering, dedicated colleagues deserve dustbin lid-sized medals' 
'It had me in stitches, it had me in tears' 
'Top-drawer stuff ... utterly riveting' 
'I don't often take the time to review books here, but would very much recommend Anti-Social.'

Anti-Social

the Sunday Times-bestselling diary of an anti-social behaviour officer

Stephen Fry

______________________________ 
The original bestselling autobiography by comedian, novelist and national treasure Stephen Fry. 
 
Few people serve time in prison before studying at Cambridge. You might be surprised to know that Stephen Fry is one of them. 
 
Moab is My Washpot, the remarkable story of Stephen Fry's tumultuous early life, is by turns funny, shocking, tender, delicious, sad, lyrical, bruisingly frank and addictively readable. 
 
It's the story of a boy sent to a boarding school 200 miles from home at the age of seven, who survives beatings, misery, love, ecstasy, carnal violation, expulsion, imprisonment, criminal conviction, probation and catastrophe to emerge, at eighteen, ready to try and face the world in which he had always felt a stranger. 
 
Fry writes with the wit and warmth which have become his hallmark, but with shocking candour too. For anyone seeking to understand one of Britain's greatest cultural treasures, this book is utterly essential reading.

Moab Is My Washpot

Tim Samuels

Of the 200,000 years homo sapiens has been wandering this planet, this has to be the most absurd and challenging time to be a man… 
 
How can you hunt and gather in an open-plan office? 
Is monogamy fighting a losing battle against testes size? 
Why do men make up 95% of FTSE CEOs yet 95% of the prison population? 
 
Trapped in bodies barely changed since caveman days, males are now contending with corporate culture, lifelong commitment, rampant depression and crazy expectations to be a success at work and home. 
Enter award-winning BBC broadcaster and journalist Tim Samuels with Who Stole My Spear? &shy;- which stops at nothing to explore how men should actually be living these days. From relationships, religion, and the rise of ISIS, to porn, fatherhood and the oppression of office life. Nothing is taboo: Is it less serious when a man has an affair? Why don’t new parents want boys? 
 
Who Stole My Spear? is an inspiring rallying call for men and ‘good masculinity’ which cannot be ignored – that will leave you rethinking much about life’s big questions. And for women who wonder what’s on a man’s mind, this is the book that offers the entertainingly explosive answer.

Who Stole My Spear?

Colin Taylor

‘Policing is like this everywhere but not everywhere is Scilly’ 
 
Meet Sergeant Colin Taylor, he has been a valuable member of the police force for over 20 years, 5 of which have been spent policing the ‘quiet’ Isles of Scilly, a group of islands off the southwestern tip of the Cornish peninsula. 
 
Colin has made it his purpose to keep the streets of Scilly free from drunk anchor thieves, Balance Board riders and other culprits, mostly drunken, intent on breaking the law. This book is the first hand account of how he did it. 
 
Coupled with his increasingly popular ‘Isle of Scilly Police Force’ Facebook page, this book charts the day to day trials and tribulations of a small-island police officer, told in a perfectly humorous and affectionate way. This book is a fantastic read and Colin's antics are soon to be the feautre of a major ITV TV series.

The Life of a Scilly Sergeant

Richard Webber

Many people consider Tony Hancock to be the finest comic actor of them all. November 2004 sees the 50th anniversary of his best-loved work, Hancock's Half-Hour, which began as a radio series, penned by the writers Galton and Simpson. Two years later, the first of 58 TV instalments had been screened, and Hancock's genius, coupled with Galton and Simpson's brilliant scripts, ensured that the show soon became a yardstick against which all subsequent British sitcoms have since been measured. 
Amazingly, no book has ever been written about the show. 
 
Fully authorised by Galton and Simpson, Fifty Years of Hancock's Half-Hour is a full history of the show, including how the show came about, behind-the-scenes stories from Hancock's fellow artists and members of the crew and production team, and the story of its demise. Incorporating extracts from the shows, the book will also feature photographs and a full listing of the radio and TV episodes.

Fifty Years Of Hancock's Half Hour

Bridget Christie

Bridget Christie is a stand-up comedian, idiot and feminist. On the 30th of April 2012, a man farted in the Women’s Studies Section of a bookshop and it changed her life forever. 
 
A Book For Her details Christie’s twelve years of anonymous toil in the bowels of stand-up comedy and the sudden epiphany that made her, unbelievably, one of the most critically acclaimed British stand-up comedians this decade, drawing together the threads that link a smelly smell in the women’s studies section to the global feminist struggle. 
 
Find out how nice Peter Stringfellow’s fish tastes, how yoghurt advertising perpetuates rape myths, and how Emily Bronte used a special ladies’ pen to write Wuthering Heights. 
 
If you’re interested in comedy and feminism, then this is definitely the book for you. If you hate both then I’d probably give it a miss. 
 
“Christie is adept at turning on a sixpence between being comical, or serious, or both at once, and at pricking her own earnestness.” Telegraph 
 
‘Christie piles derision and tomfoolery upon everyday sexism, while never pretending that jokes alone will solve the problem.’ Guardian

A Book for Her

Rosy Edwards

The laugh-out-loud true story of one girl's experience of life on Tinder. 
 
Rosy Edwards is the epitome of a contradictory twenty-something year old. She’s frugal when it comes to food shopping, but is willing to splash out on shampoo. She’s career minded, she just doesn’t know which career to have in mind right now. And although she’s happy being single, a part of her kind of wants a boyfriend. 
 
So after a few unsuccessful dates with friends of friends (read: being forced to date their shortest/dullest/oddest acquaintance), she put herself on Tinder, the app that has transformed the world of online dating. And she soon learns the unspoken rules the hard way: always reject a guy with black and white profile pics (he is ginger and/or ugly); is wearing a hat (bald); has a shot of his torso (moron) or is not standing beside anything scaleable (5”8 and under). 
 
And then there are the dates themselves. From a sky-high dinner date to a borderline drug bust in Chelsea, Rosy has experienced it all, swinging through her love life on the trapeze of Tinder. She falls for the wrong guys, ditches the nice ones, but can she finally find her happy ending. 
 
Brilliantly honest and hilariously funny, Rosy’s story shows us all that the key to a successful love life could just be a swipe away.

Confessions of a Tinderella

John Cleese

A candid and brilliantly funny memoir... 
 
...of how a tall, shy youth from Weston-super-Mare went on to become a self-confessed comedy legend. 
 
En route, John Cleese describes his nerve-wracking first public appearance at St Peter’s Preparatory School at the age of eight and five-sixths; his endlessly peripatetic home life with parents who seemed incapable of staying in any house for longer than six months; his first experiences in the world of work as a teacher who knew nothing about the subjects he was expected to teach; his hamster-owning days at Cambridge; and his first encounter with the man who would be his writing partner for over two decades, Graham Chapman. 
 
And so on to his dizzying ascent via scriptwriting for Peter Sellers, David Frost, Marty Feldman and others to the heights of Monty Python. 
 
Punctuated from time to time with John Cleese’s thoughts on topics as diverse as the nature of comedy, the relative merits of cricket and waterskiing, and the importance of knowing the dates of all the kings and queens of England, this is a masterly performance by a former schoolmaster.

So, Anyway...

The Autobiography

Lisa Lynch

Updated with new material, The C Word is the incredibly moving, darkly humorous account of one woman's fight against breast cancer. Now a BBC Drama starring Sheridan Smith. 
 
The last thing Lisa Lynch had expected to put on her 'things to do before you're 30' list was beating breast cancer, but them's the breaks. So with her life on hold, and her mind stuffed with unspoken fears, questions and emotions, she turned to her computer and started blogging about the frustrating, life-altering, sheer pain-in-the-arse inconvenience of getting breast cancer at the age of 28. 
 
The C-Word is an unflinchingly honest and darkly humorous account of Lisa's battle with The Bullshit, as she came to call it. From the good days when she could almost pretend it wasn't happening, to the bad days, when she couldn't bear to wake up, Lisa's story is emotional, heartbreaking and often hilarious. The C-Word will make you laugh and cry, and ultimately reaffirm your faith in life.

The C-Word

Tommy Cooper

Dive into the wonderful world of Tommy Cooper! 
 
The perfect gift for anyone who loves to laugh, packed with side-splitting humour and classic one-liners from the legendary comedian, including:<ul><li>"My wife is a magician, yesterday she turned our car into a tree."</li><li>"A big white horse walks into a pub. The barman says, 'we have a drink named after you.' The horse says, 'what? Eric?'"</li><li>"I said, 'waiter, what's that in my soup?' he said, 'I'd better call the boss, I can't tell one insect from another.'"</li><li>"I'm reading a book called 'Sex Before 20'. Personally I don't like audiences."</li><li>"I said, 'it's serious, doctor, I've broken my arm in 20 places'. He said, 'well stop going to those places.'"</li><li>"I call my car flattery. It gets me nowhere."</li></ul> 
Bringing together his timeless wit and charm, the All in One Joke Book reveals why Tommy Cooper remains one of our greatest and most beloved comedians of all time.

Tommy Cooper All In One Joke Book

Book Joke, Joke Book

Stephen Whitehead

Are you a Neanderthal (unreconstructed male)?  Or perhaps you're married to a Manchild (think midlife crisis)?  Is your brother a Cool Poser (he thinks he is)?  Or do you work with a Corporate Man? We all know that men come in many shapes and sizes - but do you know how to recognise the difference between an Achilles and an Adonis?  This highly entertaining guide shows you how to identify the man in your life - or recognise your own personality.  Written in a tongue-in-cheek, accessible style, this book contains serious insights into the nature of men and masculinity by a respected expert on gender studies.  Starting with a guide to modern men and their behaviours, it then goes on to reveal the 27 different faces of men in detail.  For every woman who wants to find out more about the man in her life (or how to recognise the ones she needs to stay away from in future), or for every man who wants to find out why he behaves the way he does, this book is a must.

The Many Faces Of Men

Simon Fanshawe

This is a book for those who unashamedly want manners in the world. They are the essence of living together. And we are struggling to find rules that we can agree on in a new world where change and uncertainty are a way of life and personal responsibility is at a disastrous low. 
 
No-one wants to bow and scrape to the rhythms of outdated etiquette any more.We need to seek out the original social purpose of manners and apply the principles to life today. We need rules of respect for each other and an agreement to stick to them. Combining an appeal to history, anthropology and common sense with a witty disdain for the sillier snobberies of the traditionalists, Simon Fanshawe has borrowed the format of Erasmus's great work on behaviour, De Civilitate Morum Puerilum, and created a modern basis for good manners. 
 
So it doesn't matter if you pass the port to the right or the left as long as it goes in one direction and that way everyone gets a drink. Hold your knife any way you want except as a weapon so strangers will never feel threatened at your table. Date, eat, work, speak, dress, talk on your mobile, tip, text, take your children to eat out in any way you like as long as you do it in a way that respects other people. This is a campaign. Join now and march.

The Done Thing

William Cook

One Leg Too Few will feature an extensive range of fresh interviews, previously unpublished archive material and a wealth of information about the most creative (and explosive) double act that British comedy has ever produced. 
 
One Leg Too Few is a book about an extraordinary relationship: a friendship, a partnership - almost, at times, a marriage. Like a lot of marriages it ended badly, but for nearly 20 years, between the first date and the inevitable divorce, Peter Cook and Dudley Moore were the funniest thing on three continents. 
 
One Leg Too Few is the story of that relationship, and the comedy that came from it.

One Leg Too Few

Ron Burgundy

_______________________ 
The autobiography everyone has been waiting for: a shockingly candid and raw confessional from an international treasure. 
 
The world’s most trusted and beloved television News Anchor, Ron Burgundy, pulls no punches in Let Me Off at the Top! Burgundy tells the tale of his humble beginnings in a desolate Iowa coal-mining town to his years at Our Lady Queen of Chewbacca High School to his odds-defying climb to the dizzying heights of Anchordom. 
 
In his very own words Burgundy reveals his most private thoughts, his triumphs – and his disappointments. His life reads like an adventure story complete with knock-down fights, beautiful women and double-fisted excitement on every page. He has hunted jackalopes with Bobby Kennedy and Peter Lawford, had more than his share of amorous exploits and formed the greatest on-air team in the history of televised news. Along the way, he’s hobnobbed with people you wish you knew and some you honestly wish you didn’t— celebrities, presidents, presidents’ wives, celebrities’ wives, dogs and, of course, Veronica Corningstone, the love of his life. Who didn’t Mr. Burgundy, or ‘Ron’, as he is known to his friends, rub elbows with in the course of his colourful and often criminal life? 
 
This may well be the most thrilling book ever written, by a man of great physical, moral and spiritual strength and, not surprisingly, a great literary talent as well. We owe it to him, and to ourselves, to read it. 
 
With never-before-seen photographs. Some in colour!

Let Me Off at the Top!

My Classy Life and Other Musings

J. F. Roberts

___________________ 
They had a cunning plan. 
 
A few decades ago, three young grads from England's greatest universities - Oxford, Cambridge, and Hull (actually, Manchester) - came up with a historical comedy series. Few thought it would live long in the memory. 
 
Today, Blackadder is a timeless comic masterpiece, and its stars have gone on to glittering careers. The True History of the Black Adder is the first ever history of one of Britain's greatest and most unique sitcoms, from its medieval beginnings to its legendary tragic finale. 
 
Informed by exclusive - and hilarious - interviews with essential figures like Rowan Atkinson, Tony Robinson, Ben Elton, Stephen Fry, Brian Blessed and many more, this the definitive account of how a British institution came to be, as well as a fascinating look into how this classic comedy was almost very different - and a compendium of brilliantly funny anecdotes from a team of Britain's most celebrated comedians. 
 
British history is a patchwork of questionable stories, constantly rewritten, re-evaluated and ridiculed; final editorial control has always belonged to the winners. And nobody likes winners... 
 
At last, Blackadder enthusiasts can now uncover THE cunning plan, in all its hideous hilarity.

The True History of the Blackadder

The Unadulterated Tale of the Creation of a Comedy Legend

After sharpening his mind in The Know-It-All and achieving spiritual enlightenment in The Year of Living Biblically, A.J. Jacobs had only one thing left to tackle in the self-improvement trinity: the body. But his mission wasn't just to lose a couple of pounds, but to turn his current self - 'a mushy, easily winded, moderately sickly blob' - into a paragon of health and vitality. 
 
Armed with a team of medical advisers and a 53-page task list, Jacobs set to work. He subjected his body to a brutal regime of exercise programmes - extreme chewing, anti-gravity yoga and shoeless jogging to name only a few; sampled every miracle diet going, beginning with the 'coffee, booze and chocolate' plan through the 'Rastafarian diet' to raw foodism; as well as sharpening his eyes and mind, testing every known method, and the patience of his long-suffering wife, in his quest to become as healthy as humanly possible. 
 
Drop Dead Healthy is a hilarious account of one man's painful journey from slob to superman, and a fascinating and eye-opening examination of what it really means to be healthy. Revealing the ugly truth about the assumptions and obsessions we have about our bodies, this might just be the healthiest book you'll ever read.

Drop Dead Healthy

One Man's Humble Quest for Bodily Perfection

Adam Wasson

Jessica Stamen

Let's face it, there are thousands of books on the market on how to avoid self-destructive behaviour - but how many tell you to embrace self-destruction, enjoy it and pursue it to its fullest extent? The goal of the book is simple: to help you not to help yourself. To that end, the authors offer advice on everything from how to stalk an ex to how to develop a drinking problem. Wondering which gateway drug is right for you? This book will help you decide. Not sure how much degradation you can take? This book will help you push your limits. No matter what self-destructive behaviour you're interested in pursuing, the chances are that this book will have some valuable advice and encouragement for you. There is nothing more life affirming than total destruction, but it can be a difficult and sometimes lonely road. That is why, if you remember only one thing as you read this book, it should be this: the whole point of self-destruction is that it's fun. If you're not having fun, then you might as well be taking vitamins, 'working' on your relationships and reading self-help books. Your goal here should be to develop and pursue your self-destructive tendencies to their fullest potential, and have a good time doing it.

The Self Destruction Handbook

8 Simple Steps to an Unhealthier You

Mark Kermode

If blockbusters make money no matter how bad they are, then why not make a good one for a change? 
 
How can 3-D be the future of cinema when it's been giving audiences a headache for over a hundred years? 
 
Why pay to watch films in cinemas that don't have a projectionist but do have a fast-food stand? 
 
And, in a world where Sex and the City 2 was a hit, what are film critics even for? 
 
Outspoken, opinionated and hilariously funny, The Good, The Bad and The Multiplex is a must for anyone who has ever sat in an undermanned, overpriced cinema and wondered: 'How the hell did things get to be this terrible?'

The Good, The Bad and The Multiplex

Bruce Dessau

Beyond a Joke is a celebration of comedy - one of the modern world's most dominant and compelling art forms - but it is also the story of comedy's dark side, homing in on the scandals that have surrounded some of light entertainment's biggest stars, and telling it as it is, featuring insight from one who was there at the time. 
 
While Beyond a Joke explores the extremes of this world it also addresses another question. Are comedians naturally dysfunctional, or does the stress and pressure of the job make them dysfunctional? Ruby Wax once told the author that she had builders in her house who were just as emotionally unstable as most stand-up comedians she had worked with. But they don't want to go on stage and plead with an audience to love them. 
 
Bruce Dessau is the only person who could write this book. From Russell Brand slashing his chest onstage to Jo Brand trashing a friend's car on the motorway, he has heard it all. Bruce Dessau knows where the bodies are buried.

Beyond a Joke

Inside the Dark World of Stand-up Comedy

James Corden

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLING AUTOBIOGRAPHY 
 
So... the story of my life. 
 
I've often thought about this moment, about what it would be like to write my memoirs. I always thought it would make me feel important. It doesn't. If anything it makes me feel a little strange. 
 
The truth is, I should never have been this famous guy. I wasn't the cool, clever, good-looking boy at school. But I always dreamt of it, hoped for it, longed for it: throughout school when I was disruptive, in my teens when I tried to form my own boy band and through hundreds of auditions for parts which were met with constant rejection. Until finally I co-wrote Gavin and Stacey. And my whole life changed... 
 
This is that story. The story of how I found myself here, talking to you.

May I Have Your Attention Please?

Frank Skinner

A collection of Frank Skinner's most brilliant, biting, gut-bustingly funny columns for The Times. 
 
For several years, legendary comedian Frank Skinner wrote a weekly column for The Times. Without fail, he sat down and wracked his brain to think of something to write 900 words about, frequently giving up and writing about football instead. Dispatches from the Sofa is the brilliant result. 
 
Pondering such random topics as the potential demise of Margaret Thatcher, the love-hate relationship with your football club, the banking crisis and the evil phenomenon of Jedward, this is wit and wisdom, and a fine sense of the absurd, all rolled into one.

Dispatches From the Sofa

The Collected Wisdom of Frank Skinner

John Crace

John Crace's 'Digested Read' column in the Guardian has rightly acquired a cult following. Each week fans avidly devour his latest razor-sharp literary assassination, while authors turn tremblingly to the appropriate page of the review section, fearful that it may be their turn to be mercilessly sent up. 
 
Now he turns his critical eye on the classics of the last century, offering bite-sized pastiches of everything from Mrs Dalloway to Trainspotting via Lolita and The Great Gatsby. Those who have never quite got around to reading A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man will be delighted to find its essence distilled into a handful of paragraphs. Those who have never really enjoyed Lord of the Flies will be pleased to find it hilariously parodied in an easily swallowable 982 words. And those who find all such works a little highbrow will be relieved to discover, between the covers of this book, John Crace's take on the likes of Ian Fleming, P. G. Wodehouse and the Highway Code. 
 
Witty and sharp, this is essential reading both for those who genuinely love literature and for those who merely want to appear ridiculously well read.

Brideshead Abbreviated

The Digested Read of the Twentieth Century

Ronnie Barker was one of our most respected and best-loved comedy actors and here, in this fascinating biography, Richard Webber delves deep in to the heart of Barker's life and career, peppering his narrative with original and incisive memories from some of Barker's closest contemporaries, including Ronnie Corbett, Michael Palin and Barry Cryer. 
 
Star of the much-adored comedy classics Porridge, The Two Ronnies - one of the most successful and long-running television comedy shows ever on British television - and Open All Hours, Ronnie Barker was universally admired by the public and industry insiders alike. From his early days writing for and performing skits on The Frost Report right up to his retirement in 1988, he lit up television screens across the country with his wonderful gift for comedy and his remarkable skill for character acting. 
 
Beyond his performances on the stage and screen, Barker was also an accomplished comedy writer, providing many of the sketches and songs for The Two Ronnies and contributing material to a number of other television and radio shows. And despite his retirement he retained pole position in the public's affection, returning to the screen in 1999 to team up with his erstwhile comedy partner and great friend Ronnie Corbett for a Two Ronnies night on BBC1, followed by a BAFTA tribute in 2004 and a final appearance on television in 2005 on The Two Ronnies Christmas Sketchbook. 
 
Effortlessly funny, universally adored and an actor and writer responsible for some of Britain's best-loved and most-respected comedy, Ronnie Barker was a true comedy legend. Here he's brought to the page in winning style as he's remembered by those who best loved and knew him.

Remembering Ronnie Barker

Simon Pegg

From a filthy flat in Tufnell Park to the starship Enterprise, it's fair to say that Simon Pegg's career didn't go quite the way he expected. 
 
Zombies in North London, death cults in the West Country, a warp engine beyond the final frontier: Simon Pegg has been ploughing some bizarre furrows in recent times. Having blasted onto the small screens with his now legendary sitcom Spaced, his rise to the status of the nation's favourite son has been mercurial, meteoric, megatronnic, but mostly just plain great. 
 
From his childhood (and subsequently adult) obsession with Star Wars, his often passionate friendship with Nick Frost, and his forays into stand-up which began with his regular Monday morning slot in front of his 12-year-old classmates, this is a joyous tale of a homegrown superstar and a local boy made good. 
 
CONTENT WARNING: This book features discussion of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, a film which some readers may find distressing.

Nerd Do Well

A hilarious collection of the many articles written by Stephen Fry for magazines, newspapers and radio. It includes selected wireless essays of Donald Trefusis, the ageing professor of philology brought to life in Fry's novel The Liar, and the best of Fry's weekly column for the Daily Telegraph. 
 
Perfect to dip into but just as enjoyable to read cover to cover, this book, perhaps more than any other, shows the breadth of Fry's interests and the depth of his insight. He remains a hilarious writer on whatever topic he puts his mind to.

Paperweight

Susie Dent

'Susie Dent is a national treasure' RICHARD OSMAN 
 
'Susie Dent is a one-off. She breathes life and fun into words and language' PAM AYRES 
__________________________________________ 
 
Would you be bewildered if someone described you as radgy? 
Do you know how to recognise a tittamatorter? 
And would you understand if someone called you a culchie? 
 
How to Talk Like a Local gathers together hundreds of words from all over the country and digs down to uncover their origins. From dardledumdue, which means daydreamer in East Anglia, through forkin robbins, the Yorkshire term for earwigs, to clemt, a Lancashire word that means hungry, it investigates an astonishingly rich variety of regional expressions, and provides a fascinating insight into the history of the English language. 
 
If you're intrigued by colourful words and phrases, if you're interested in how English is really spoken, or if you simply want to find out a bit more about the development of our language, How to Talk Like a Local is irresistible - and enlightening - reading. 
__________________________________________________ 
 
'Nobody on earth knows more about the English language than Susie Dent and nobody writes about it more entertainingly' GYLES BRANDRETH 
 
'It's an interesting and, at times, hilarious read. One for word-lovers' THE SUN

How to Talk Like a Local

A National Phrasebook from the author of Word Perfect

Charlie Croker

How long does the average British male spend in the shower? 
 
What is the worst-paid job? 
 
Where are the keenest DIYers in the UK to be found? 
 
Which profession least favours the wearing of ties? 
 
Why are 63% of us too embarrassed to complain about bad food in a restaurant? 
 
Covering everything from food to travel, via gardening and fashion, 8 out of 10 Brits tells you everything you need to know, and much that you don't, about who we are, where we're going, and why - on statistical grounds - we should all consider living in Southend-on-Sea.

8 out of 10 Brits

Intriguing statistics about the world's 79th largest nation

Jem Roberts

'It's a great missing piece of the jigsaw - people go on endlessly about Python and Peter Cook, which is all well and good but there's basically this great corpus of work stretching for decades - and consistently good ... A major piece of work, and universally loved.' 
 
So says John Lloyd, brains behind Blackadder, QI, Spitting Image, and so much besides - all shows with a massive debt to I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again and I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue. Together they form a body of work stretching across five decades, from Cambridge in 1960 to today's world-beating Antidote to Panel Games, a laughter-bringer which has inspired unparalleled adoration in millions over fifty series. This book tells the whole story, from Footlights to Broadway to the ferret-filled madness of Radio Prune - comedy's answer to the rock &amp; roll revolution of the sixties. Offering an exhaustive guide to the comedy world that brought us Mornington Crescent, besides episode guides, glossaries and rare facsimiles, Jem Roberts will take the story right up to the present day, celebrating the lives of Willie Rushton, Sir David Hatch and of course, the irreplaceable Humphrey Lyttelton. With exclusive input from the Teams, plus Bill Oddie, Stephen Fry, Bill Bailey, Neil Innes and many more, this is the long-overdue authoritative, entertaining and, above all, very silly lasting celebration of an unsung comic legacy that both shows so richly deserve.

The Fully Authorised History of I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue

The Clue Bible from Footlights to Mornington Crescent

For his first book, AJ Jacobs read the entire Encyclopedia Britannica. For his second, he followed every single rule in the Bible. Now comes a collection of his most outrageous, hilarious and thought-provoking experiments yet. 
 
In My Experimental Life Jacobs puts himself to a series of bizarre and ridiculous tests, from total obedience to his long-suffering wife and 'Radical Honesty', to living as a beautiful woman and outsourcing his personal life to India (whether sending an email, having a weekly chat with his parents or arguing with his wife). 
 
Written by an author who has been compared in the British press to Woody Allen and Bill Bryson, The Guinea Pig Diaries will be one of the funniest, most entertaining and most illuminating books of the year.

My Experimental Life

The year is 1Q84. This is the real world, there is no doubt about that. But in this world, there are two moons in the sky. Discover the 1Q84 Trilogy by Haruki Murakami.

1Q84

365 Days of Art

A BBC Christmas

A Black Book Thriller

A Box Full of Murders

A Cal Leandros Novel

A Christmas Mystery

The intelligent and capable police commissioner Guido Brunetti confronts crime in and around his home town of Venice.

A Commissario Brunetti Mystery

A DC Smith / Kings Lake Investigation Series

A Daisy Story

Chronicling the lives of over three hundred characters, unrivalled for its scope and humour, this is a unique evocation of life in twentieth-century England.

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