Hordes Of The Things

Paul Eddington, Simon Callow, Patrick Magee, Frank Middlemass, Christian Rodska and Maggie Steed all star in the complete comedy fantasy series - as heard on BBC Radio 4.

... plenty of comedy and action but enough reverence for its source material to ensure ardent fans are left smiling not fuming

For fans of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and ElvenQuest, this is the epic fantasy series first heard on BBC Radio 4 in 1980 that wonderfully parodies J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings. The kingdom of Albion is under threat from The Evil One, and the wizard Radox The Green has found a hero to save the land: Agar, Son of Athar (who has a minotaur called Stephen). Written by Andrew Marshall (writer of 2point4 Children) and John Lloyd (creator of QI), here are all four episodes of the classic radio series - now available for the first time. Starring Patrick Magee as the Chronicler, Paul Eddington as King Yulfric, Simon Callow as Prince Veganin, Christian Rodska as Agar, Frank Middlemass as Radox the Green, Maggie Steed as Queen Elfreda and Jonathan Lynn (co-creator of Yes, Minister) as the dwarf Golin Longshanks.

Rob Grant

Andrew Marshall

James Fleet

Cassie Layton

Kevin Eldon

Freddie Fox

John Sessions

Rachel Atkins

Ryan Sampson

The complete BBC Radio 4 sci-fi comedy

London, England, 1952. 
 
Meet the mercurial genius Professor Quanderhorn (James Fleet) - a maverick scientist with absolutely no moral compass. Join him and his rag-tag crew on their frontal-lobe-knotting escapades as they: 
 
· Battle insane hybrid creatures: the Gorrirrel and the Squirrilla, to the death! 
· Become Gods to a Stone Age tribe 
· Are engulfed in a Martian invasion of Earth 
· Escape shipwreck on the Moon in a spacecraft powered by anger 
· Evade multiple fiendish traps in the Alien Ziggurat of Death 
· Tussle with a Top Secret Parrot 
· Become terminally confused when they encounter their past selves in a Time accident... 
 
Will our crew of Brave Boffins survive? 
 
And what a crew they are: Q's part insect son, Troy, reputedly a "major breakthrough in Artificial Stupidity" (Freddie Fox); eager young Test Pilot and recovering amnesiac, Brian Nylon (Ryan Sampson); brilliant scientist Dr. Gemini Janussen with her half-clockwork brain (Cassie Layton); captured Martian hostage Guuuurk (Kevin Eldon); sinister janitor Jenkins (John Sessions), and synthetic-voice-commentator-later-inserted-into-diving-suit, Dolores (Rachel Atkins). 
 
Plug in your blue and red cardboard airpods and pair your tin foil router with the Droitwich transmitter array for an adventure beyond human understanding. 
 
Get it now, in Super-Vis-O-Download-O-Sound! [patent refused] 
 
This Collexion includes both series of the BBC Radio 4 sci-fi comedy, plus ten never-before-heard deleted scenes and interviews with the cast and crew. 
 
Track listing: 
 
Series 1: 
1. It's Eating My Face 
2. Mummy! My Donkey's Head is Exploding 
3. A Little Thing Like Chocolate Gates Can't Stop Us 
4. The Splattered Remains of Unidentifiable Organs Incident All Over Again 
5. Fear! Terror! Gut-wrenching Horror! Arg Arg. Please! 
6. Dah dah dah dah dah dahh Dah dah dah dah dahhh... 
 
Series 2: 
7. Killdiboos and Universibold Explodibangbang 
8. Shoveleth in More Hazlenuts! 
9. Wasp 
10. I Didn't Say it was Well Cloaked 
11. Am I Actually the Other Half of Gemma Emma Emma? 
12. I Heregy Thind You Guilky 
 
Deleted scenes: 
 13. Psychopathic Wasp (Series 1, Ep 6) 
14. Crockery Cupboard (Series 1, Ep 6) 
 15. Guuuurk Diary (Series 2, Ep1) 
 16. Nut Merchant (Series 2, Ep 2) 
 17. Bongo-playing Beatniks from Under the Sea (Series 2, Ep 4) 
 18. Martian Training (Series 2, Ep 4) 
 19. Martian Countdown (Series 2, Ep 5) 
20. Churchill Full Speech (Series 2, Ep 5) 
 21. Quanderhorn Prison Diary (Series 2, Ep 5) 
 22. Make your own Martian Opera Tracks (Series 2, Ep 6) 
 
Cast and crew interviews: 
23. Gordon interviews Rob, Andrew and sound designer Alisdair MacGregor 
24. Rob and Andrew interview composer Peter Brewis 
25. Gordon interviews Freddie Fox 
26. Gordon interviews John Sessions 
27. Gordon interviews Rachel Atkins and James Fleet 
28. Gordon interviews Ryan Sampson and Cassie Layton 
29. Gordon interviews Kevin Eldon 
 
Cast and credits: 
Professor Quanderhorn - James Fleet 
Brian Nylon - Ryan Sampson 
Dr Gemini Janussen - Cassie Layton 
Guuuurk - Kevin Eldon 
Troy Quanderhorn - Freddie Fox 
Churchill/Jenkins - John Sessions 
Synthetic Voice/Mrs Bessie Braddock (MP)/Virginia White/Dolores - Rachel Atkins 
Created and written by Rob Grant and Andrew Marshall 
 Directed by Andrew Marshall 
 Music by Peter Brewis 
 Engineered, Edited and Sound designed by Alisdair McGregor 
 Production Manager: Sarah Tombling 
 Produced by Rob Grant and Gordon Kennedy 
 Recorded at The Soundhouse Studios 
Special Thanks to Edward Rowett 
 
An Absolutely Production for BBC Radio 4 first broadcast in June 2018 (Series 1) and May 2020 (Series 2).

Andrew Marshall

Books by Andrew Marshall

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